We have made it through the first week of 2023.
It is a true blessing to still be in the land of the living and to write this piece.
Through my morning prayer and reflection, I thought about the guilt we may carry from previous experiences. We think on what happened, what we should have done and carry the guilt on how everything played out.
I can reflect on numerous experiences in which I carried guilt but something happened to me last week that made me see thing in a whole new way.
I entered 2020 answering the call God had called me to do. I was at peace and in the best shape of my life physically....then life happened and I started to prioritize everything above what I knew I should have been doing. By the end of 2021 I was overly stressed, my house was upside down, I neglected my call, and realized I had gained close to 30 pounds. This instantly put me in a space of not feeling my best.
Soooo, what did I do? Found a stress less job and hired a coach. Because in that moment my priority was to get my house right side up and to lose this excess weight. For the year of 2022 I changed my eating, joined a bootcamp, did extra workouts outside of bootcamps only to leave the year the same way I entered. Looking the same and carrying the same excess weight. The beauty of 2022 was I learned to take care of myself internally so that I could better show up for my family.
During the last two weeks of 2022 I started to feel the impact, the guilt of not answering to my call since January of 2020. What did I do? Made a declaration to get back into writing and sharing what was given to me. On January 2, 2023 I posted a return video to my blog. I felt the guilt of disobedience leave. Whew! On Tuesday, January 3 I walked into the office and two of my co-workers stared at me and said..."you have lost so much weight." In my mind I realized I was no longer carrying the weight of guilt and it was started to show physically. WOW!
If you are carrying the weight of guilt.. guilt of your past, losing countless moments/thoughts, exerting a lot of energy attempting to change what will forever be take a deep breath and learn to let it go. Don't waste the life we have today trying to change a moment in time that has already passed. Show up for your self, be presence, get the support as put down the weight of guilt. Live, live, and continue to live in joy.
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